One thing I think I got from my dad was a love for music. He introduced me to a few artists that I still listen to every now and then, even though our tastes mostly differ now. But I think if you ask people why they love it they will probably name a lot of the same things. Music can be so powerful; I feel that anyone who doesn't recognize the beauty of it is missing out on a wondrous part of life.
I heard one today that really touched me; it's in the playlist on the side over there - Healing Waters by Michelle Tumes. She's not an LDS artist, so it's not a typical-ish Kapp-Perry-type song. (I'll be honest, sometimes that stuff is not my favorite). This one I really really loved.
I've been thinking for the past couple of years about the church and my part in it. Lately I've wanted less to do with it than I care to admit; I would've rather not been bothered... I've struggled and I didn't really even care. I know I thought too much about things that didn't matter and got lazy, and I've been rebellious in my heart.
This is really personal, but like McKenna said, "since this is my blog I shouldn't be hesitant to write about it."
In the last month a few things have happened that have helped to change my attitude a little bit I think... I have been blessed to feel the spirit more than I have in a long long time... and I keep thinking, I'm so stupid... I've been missing out on this for so long... why wouldn't I want to have this in my life?
I'm not perfect, in fact I'm so weak and prone to be rebellious it is not even funny... traits that make me human I guess. I don't want to change who I am, but I want things to be different. I want it to mean something. And I also want to be a better example than I have been. I've taken so much for granted.
I've been blessed with so so much. I count a loving family, immediate and not-immediate, as my greatest blessing. Add the joy and peace that can come from the gospel and it is totally immeasurable to me. I am so humbled at how quick Heavenly Father is to let me feel his love, even after being as I have.
There I've totally borne my soul. You don't have to agree with me, but that's how I feel.
1 comment:
I sort of recently had a "come to Jesus" moment too, I've realized I've been really selfish with my relationship with Heavenly Father. Mostly just cuz I'm incredibly lazy. I'm going to make things different too :) PS thanks for letting me par-tay with you guys last night, it was da bomb dot com
Post a Comment