Yeah, that was an interesting post for stimulating some spirited thought and discussion. Relationships are definitely messy, in more ways than one. Simple friendships can lead to emotional affairs that eventually result in physical affairs, as well as the other way around.
There are those who say that the idea of monogamy itself is in direct opposition to the innate biological tendency of every living species to reproduce, just as they must also eat, sleep, breathe, and excrete waste. Sometimes it makes you wonder when you look at the infidelity statistics. Check some interesting ones out at http://www.infidelityfacts.com/infidelity-statistics.html . I won't list them all, but some I find eye opening:
* Percentage of men who admit to committing infidelity in any relationship they've had: 57%
* Percentage of women who admit to committing infidelity in any relationship they've had: 54%
* Percentage of men who say they would have an affair if they knew they would never get caught: 74%
* Percentage of women who say they would have an affair if they knew they would never get caught: 68%
Anyway, I find it interesting how different the approaches are that people take in dealing with the matter. On one end, you have strictly monogamous people who would say not to trust their spouses with someone of the opposite sex at all and who would be devastated by cheating. On the other end are people who view it as a natural biological need and decide to trust their partners in an open marriage arrangement, such as occurs with swingers or those practicing polyamory. And then there are the people in the middle.
So many people, so many perspectives, as usual. Who's to say who's right and who's wrong? I think the important thing is to avoid hurting others and to treat them well, with respect and trust.
It must be an opinion thing. I am of the opinion that an open relationship or any cheating would definitely be devastating and is not okay in my book, or my marriage.
I have heard that couples who choose open relationships generally have more unhappiness with their relationship and a harder time keeping the relationship alive. It would take some more looking to find sources for you. But for me, that is not in any way okay.
By the way, I believe sex is much much more than a simple biological need. I feel sort of sad for anyone who thinks it's just a biological need to satisfy and treats it as such.
I love you! Thanks for the link Cali! It's something I feel very strongly about. Unfortunately affairs of any sort are entirely too common, and most people don't value honesty and trust as much as they claim.
On the other hand, I think people in general are too trusting in their marriages. Is that awful? Maybe. But I believe it to be absolutely true.
5 comments:
great post imo! She put into words things that I think all of us worry about. Both for myself and for my husband.
Yeah, that was an interesting post for stimulating some spirited thought and discussion. Relationships are definitely messy, in more ways than one. Simple friendships can lead to emotional affairs that eventually result in physical affairs, as well as the other way around.
There are those who say that the idea of monogamy itself is in direct opposition to the innate biological tendency of every living species to reproduce, just as they must also eat, sleep, breathe, and excrete waste. Sometimes it makes you wonder when you look at the infidelity statistics. Check some interesting ones out at http://www.infidelityfacts.com/infidelity-statistics.html . I won't list them all, but some I find eye opening:
* Percentage of men who admit to committing infidelity in any relationship they've had: 57%
* Percentage of women who admit to committing infidelity in any relationship they've had: 54%
* Percentage of men who say they would have an affair if they knew they would never get caught: 74%
* Percentage of women who say they would have an affair if they knew they would never get caught: 68%
Anyway, I find it interesting how different the approaches are that people take in dealing with the matter. On one end, you have strictly monogamous people who would say not to trust their spouses with someone of the opposite sex at all and who would be devastated by cheating. On the other end are people who view it as a natural biological need and decide to trust their partners in an open marriage arrangement, such as occurs with swingers or those practicing polyamory. And then there are the people in the middle.
So many people, so many perspectives, as usual. Who's to say who's right and who's wrong? I think the important thing is to avoid hurting others and to treat them well, with respect and trust.
It must be an opinion thing. I am of the opinion that an open relationship or any cheating would definitely be devastating and is not okay in my book, or my marriage.
I have heard that couples who choose open relationships generally have more unhappiness with their relationship and a harder time keeping the relationship alive. It would take some more looking to find sources for you. But for me, that is not in any way okay.
By the way, I believe sex is much much more than a simple biological need. I feel sort of sad for anyone who thinks it's just a biological need to satisfy and treats it as such.
I love you! Thanks for the link Cali! It's something I feel very strongly about. Unfortunately affairs of any sort are entirely too common, and most people don't value honesty and trust as much as they claim.
On the other hand, I think people in general are too trusting in their marriages. Is that awful? Maybe. But I believe it to be absolutely true.
Thanks again!
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