Okay folks - all two of you - due to the incredulous and somewhat preposterous nature of this finding, I feel compelled to share it with you. (Kenna found it, I don't know where she finds this stuff, but she does.) NEEDGOD.COM
www.needgod.com/index.shtml
Are you a good person, by God's standards? And if so, are you good enough to get into heaven?
This is a questionaire designed to tell you just that. Such inquiries as, "Have you ever told a lie?" "Do you go to church regularly?" "Have you ever looked at someone and had lustful thoughts?" etc. etc., eight questions total. When you are done checking yes or no, you are directed to your results.
It then goes over each question, tells you what is wrong with your answer, and exactly why it is that you are going to hell. After you have read about what a bad person you are, it asks you if you are Guilty or Innocent. If you click Innocent, it tells you you are incorrect. Then asks if you think you are going to Heaven or Hell. If you click Heaven, it tells you you are incorrect.
It asks if the fact that you're going to hell concerns you, tells you that it should concern you, and then asks if you'd sell one of your eyes for a million dollars. (Don't ask me what selling your eye for money has to do with this, but heck yes I'd sell my eye for a million bucks. I've still got the other one.)
It ends with a huge allegory of what hell is, designed to scare you, then it tries to talk about the atonement, but seriously, who is going to get that far?
Nevermind that my moral character and the quality of my soul are being determined by an eight-question survey, it looks like I am going to hell. In a handbasket, no less. I wonder if my trip comes with complementary pillow-mints.
(Oh yeah, and then it politely asks you to print a copy for your records, in case you, you know, forget.)
PS, just one more thing - I'd like to know just what person in the world hasn't had a lustful thought about someone else (I'm thinking Patrick Dempsey right now)... seriously folks...
8 comments:
Sounds like this Born Again group needs new recruits into their "Fear of God" church. Why would anyone want to be a part of a church that makes you feel so bad about yourself that even your good deeds are not worth mentioning because you possibly told a lie in your lifetime. You're automatically a LIAR and are going to BURN IN HELL!!! (unless you join us).. and unless you're perfect like Jesus.... Cali... McKenna... don't read this crap!!
Ok, Patrick Dempsey would be worth going to hell over....
We gotta have something to entertain us at work!! :)
We're going to hell, too! See ya there--you bring the sunblock, and I'll bring the nudey magazines!
Where do I find this stuff? Oh,and thanks Barb, perfect I am!
It doesn't concern me though, as I always knew this was coming.
Well, at least we'll all be there together... Sarah is bring the sunblock and magazines.... I'll bring the cheeseball and crackers....
If we went to hell for telling one lie...There would probably only be 2 or 3 people in Heaven...and if that is the case...I think I want to go to hell anyway.
um.....Keith Urban still frosts my flakes..
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