These toilets are lousy

We all get that thought sometimes, don't we? "Oh this would only happen to me." It happened today in church.

I'm not the biggest fan of relief society, and usually I'm the culprit in getting us to go home early. So we've been trying to change that and make more of an effort to stay for all three meetings. Well, after the relief sociey/priesthood meetings we women go join the men for sunday school, except their meeting always goes overtime, and then we women are stuck in the hallway, waiting, forced to make awkward conversation with one another. Determined to avoid the whole shebang today, I made a break for the bathroom instead. I didn't really have to go very badly, but I thought I could muster up enough liquid to justify it.

Let me explain something - our church building is probably older than the city of provo itself, and you can tell because it's been added on to so many times, there are staircases, weird hallways and rooms in places you wouldn't know existed unless you were looking. Our sunday school room even has a fireplace in it and an old organ that doesn't work anymore that must be an antique. The last time it was probably updated was with the advent of electricity, then it was forgotten about. No, actually that would be the advent of indoor plumbing, then it was forgotten about.

I waited in line for my turn (so much for avoiding awkward conversation with strangers), and then entered the stall and did my business. When I went to flush, all the toilet did was gurgle a little, then nothing. Okay. I jiggled the handle, waited a few seconds, then pushed the flush handle again. Nothing. I stood there in disbelief. The girl before me had been able to flush, why wasn't it working for me? I peeked over the stall wall towards the door (old church, short stall walls, I'm tall), there were at least four or five other girls waiting to use the restroom, laughing and talking loudly with each other. I tried the handle again. Nothing. The girl in the stall next to me flushed and exited. Maybe I could just wait it out, wait until everyone has used the other stall, then I could sneak out and no one would ever know it was me. I tried again, and nothing. The loud chatter from the girls in line was starting to die down, something had to be done.

After another somewhat desperate attempt to flush the dang toilet, I tucked my skirt up between my knees and quietly lifted the lid from the back of the toilet and peered in. Great, this toilet's so old, it's not even the kind where the back fills with water. Instead, there's a big black cylinder which I can't see into or underneath, and I don't know what to do. I played with the flush mechanism for a minute, hoping for a miracle, when the girl in the stall next to me said, "Man, these toilets are LOUSY." Aha! I wasn't the only one having a problem! Yet there were still three people in line, and my toilet still had paper floating around in it. With hope relinquished, I sighed, and gave the flusher one last good tug, and to my amazement, it worked this time. Whew!

I exited my stall and walked toward the sink, under the stares of the other people in line. We made a few jokes about just going home next time, then I washed and went to find Geoff in sunday school.

Next week I'll just brave the awkward conversation.