I go to Walmart to pick up the stuff in the recipe. I get everything except the peaches. I go to the produce section. There are no peaches.
I go to the checkout and wait in line... and wait... and wait. The cashier has a problem and is waiting to be noticed by the problem-solver, who is not coming. I check my phone; it's been twelve minutes. I move to a different line. I notice that this line takes just as long as the last line. Twenty two minutes later, I'm in my car.
I figure if any grocery store will have fresh peaches, it's gotta be the Sunflower Market, so I drive up there. There are no peaches.
Starting to worry about not refrigerating the milk and cream that sits in my car, I head up to Center Street to try Ridley's. There are no peaches.
There are three more grocery stores I could try, but are any of them carrying peaches anymore? I decide to forget about them and drive all the way up to 1600 north to try the farmer's market. Luck! They have a box of peaches left. I pick out ten and make my way home. Glad because the cream in my car is no longer cold. Excited that now we can make pie together!
---- Later in the day ----
Geoff begins to peel the peaches and notices they are not ripe. This does not make sense to me, but sure enough, they are crunchy as apples.
Not willing to chase around town again, I make phone calls to two more grocery stores to see if they have peaches. Only Target has a few old ones. We decide to make a different kind of pie. Geoff wants lemon pie, I want key lime pie.
We go back to Walmart to get the ingredients for lemon and key lime pie. We go to check out and wait in line... and wait... and wait. Cashier has a problem and is waiting to be noticed by the problem-solver. This time we stay in line.
Eventually, Cashier starts ringing our stuff up, and his computer freezes. He waits to be noticed. Problem-solver comes and says there is nothing he can do, we must move to register 26 on the other side of the store. Problem-solver says he will come open a till for Cashier in a second.
Fighting the temptation to run away with the food, we gather our stuff and walk to the other end of the store. We wait for Problem-solver to come open a till. About 8 minutes later, Cashier decides he was forgotten about and calls someone else. Finally our stuff is rung up and we have paid. We head home.
We begin to make our respective pies. I am done making my pie, when I notice we have twice as much filling as we should, and realize I used twice as much heavy whipping cream as I should have. Now my pie is both ultra-fatty and diluted in taste. I feel like an idiot.
Not wanting to waste all that leftover pie filling, I decide to try the nearby gas station for graham crackers to eat with it. They are $3 for a teeny tiny box. I leave the gas station empty handed, and carefully avoiding Walmart, begin the drive to Target for graham crackers.
Halfway there, I change my mind and turn around. I come home. It's 9:00. I spent all day chasing around trying to make pie, so dammit, I'm going to eat pie.
I can barely finish one piece. Geoff says he doesn't like key lime pie. I am an idiot.
Do I try again tomorrow? Sure, if I can work up the nerve.
The end.
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